How to Have a Bad Day Step 8: Pretend You're Fine

Ah, the classic: "I'm fine."

We’ve all done it—slapped on a smile like it's concealer for the soul and marched into the world like we’re totally not falling apart inside.

Signs You’re Totally Not Fine (But Pretending Like You Are):

You’ve said “I’m just tired” 87 times this week. And it’s only Wednesday.

Your Google search history includes: “How to feel normal again,” and “Can I move to a lighthouse and disappear?”

You're over-explaining things no one asked about. Like why you switched shampoos in 2021.

You pretend everything’s fine while passive-aggressively slamming cabinet doors. Very chill.

Very subtle.

You say “It is what it is” 12 times a day. Translation: “I’ve emotionally checked out.”

You say “lol” but haven’t actually laughed since 2022.

You dread phone calls but feel hurt when no one calls. Welcome to the anxiety paradox.

You suddenly want bangs. Or a tattoo. Or to sell everything and move to Portugal. Classic sign. Highly suspicious.

You joke about having a breakdown... but like, not really joking. Haha... ha... ha.

Why We Do It:

We Think We Are in Control

If we don't admit it, maybe it'll go away. (Spoiler: It doesn't.)

Fear of Judgment

People will think you're a bad person because you're struggling.

It’s Easier (Short-Term)

Saying “I’m fine” is quicker than unpacking the emotional backpack filled with stress, sadness, and existential questions… especially in line at Starbucks.

We Don’t Want to Be a Burden

Somewhere along the way, we decided that being honest about pain = being “too much.” So we slap on a smile and try not to leak.

We Haven’t Admitted It to Ourselves Yet

Sometimes the “I’m fine” isn’t just for others — it’s for us. Because admitting we’re not fine? That means something might need to change.

Vulnerability Feels Risky

Being real opens the door to rejection, awkwardness, or worse… sympathy. (Cue the horror music.) So we armor up and act unbothered.

We Think It’s “More Spiritual” to Be Okay esp in Church

We confuse faith with fake peace. But Jesus never asked us to lie about our condition — He asked us to bring it to Him, confess our sins to one another, and care for each other.

We Think Being “Not Fine” = Being Weak

The truth? Denying it is the actual weakness. Owning it takes courage. And healing starts there.

Jesus Never Asked You to Pretend. In fact, He said:

“Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” — Matthew 11:28

Not: “Come to Me after you’ve pulled yourself together."

God doesn’t need your performance. He wants your honesty. Your messy. Your “I didn’t sleep and I might scream if one more person says ‘just trust God.’”

Yeah. That you.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." — John 16:33

Whoever told you the Gospel was all sunshine, success, and symptom-free living was trying to sell you something. Jesus didn’t come to make the world peaceful so your life would be easier. He came to bring peace to you — so you can face a world that isn’t.

And Guess What? You're in Good Company!

You’re not fine? Cool. Neither were the Psalmists half the time.

David wrote entire songs about crying, insomnia, and people being the worst. And those made it into Scripture.

Jesus sweat blood under emotional pressure. He gets it.

Final Thought:

You don’t have to fake it till you make it. You can faith it while you feel it. Jesus doesn’t love your “put-together” version more. He just loves you.

You're safe to not be fine. Let me say it again. It's OK to not be fine.

Now take off the emotional Spanx, breathe, and try and have a good day! You're gonna be fine! :)