How to Have a Bad Day Step 10: Gossip

Let's play a quick game. Think of a time someone stuck their nose in your business, rewrote the narrative, and then "published" it. It was onesided. It misrepresented you. Now… think of a time you did that to someone else.

Ah... awkward silence. Welcome to the club.

Before we get started, please allow me a disclaimer. The only person today's post is aimed at is myself. It was a hard one to write and I almost didn't do it. I have been guilty of it all and writing this has convicted me. Funny it wasn't really coming together until I repented of things I have been justifying and then it flowed. I hope it will change my character going forward. To those that I have allowed in my inner circle, I give you permission to hold me to account.

OK fasten your seatbelts! Here we go!

Gossip: The Original Social Media

You don’t need TikTok or Netflix when you’ve got Jeff pulled over by the cops on Main Street and Brenda from accounting’s marriage hanging by a thread. Drama is free, always streaming, and—let’s face it—it's highly addictive.

Why we love it (and won't admit it)

It makes us feel superior 

It bonds us… temporarily 

It distracts us from our own junk 

It feels like power 

It makes us feel included

It’s flat out entertaining 

Bottom line stories change. Details grow. And suddenly, your “innocent observation” has turned into “I heard from someone who heard from someone that…” and now half the town thinks Bob is in witness protection.

When Dwaine and I first moved to Saskatchewan, we used to joke that we had to go into town just to find out what was happening in our lives. Apparently, making up stories about us was more fun than actually getting to know us. And since we’re still alive and breathing, the storytelling hasn’t stopped—we’ve just stopped tuning in. The truth is, no one’s immune. Gossip doesn’t discriminate. If you’ve got a pulse, you’re a potential plot twist in someone else’s narrative.

The worst part? You can’t defend yourself without sounding guilty. You can’t correct the gossip without being called “defensive.” It’s like being locked in a glass case yelling, “That’s not what happened!” while people walk by eating popcorn.

What Scripture Has to Say About It

“A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.” — Proverbs 11:13

“Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down.” — Proverbs 26:20

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful…” — Ephesians 4:29

Not Your Circus. Not Your Monkeys.

Ever heard the Polish proverb: “Not my circus, not my monkeys”? Translation: That drama? Not my problem.

Proverbs 26:17 puts it this way:

“Grabbing a stray dog by the ears is like meddling in someone else’s argument.”

If you interfere in drama that isn’t yours, you’re asking for trouble. And possibly rabies.

Not every battle is yours to fight. Not every secret is yours to share. Not every flaw is yours to fix. So before you jump in and grab that dog or start playing with that monkey, ask: “Is this my circus?” If the answer is no — drop the monkey and walk away. You’ve got your own tent to manage.

But we aren't just consumers are we - We're Broadcasters

Got drama? What's the logical thing to do? Tell. The. Internet.

Forget praying about it, calling a trusted friend, or sleeping on it — no, the world needs your unfiltered, possibly misspelled, emotionally-charged side of the story right now.

Why do we like to put our drama out there?

We crave validation – Post a vague “I just can't…” and get 53 “U ok hun? 💕” comments. It's a false sense of feeling seen and supported.

We want to control the narrative – If people are gonna talk, I’m getting the first word in.

We want instant empathy and support – Real-life support can be slow and inconvenient. And actually require something of me. If I talk to my support network, they might not feel sorry for me and point out my responsibility in my mess. Online, I can get a flood of “prayers” and “you’re so strong” in under 10 minutes — without having to make eye contact or wear pants or (gasp) be convicted.

We are recruiting allies – Get your followers to fight for you in the comments. Truth is based on who has the loudest fans right?

We need to scratch the justice itch – “Everyone needs to know I’ve been wronged.”

Basically we just want attention – Drama posts = dopamine hits.

Paul encourages this in 1 Thessalonians 4:11:

u7er"Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands..."

Personally I think part of the problem is we're just not busy enough focusing on what matters. Ourselves and our responsibilities. Whenever our children come to "inform" us on what another child is doing, our response is always, "Are you following the rules? Why don't you worry about you. That's already a big enough job.". Maybe that's what Paul was saying.

Final Thought

Paul also instructs us in 1 Corinthians 12:23 that in the Body of Christ, “the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor… and our unpresentable parts are treated with special modesty.”

What does this mean? If someone’s going through something embarrassing, messy, or painful, your job isn’t to broadcast it — it’s to cover it. Protect it. Treat it with dignity.

But gossip flips that upside down. Instead of guarding the “uncomely parts,” we parade them downtown, add commentary, and maybe even live-stream the event. We forget that the very parts we’re mocking today are the ones we’d want covered if the spotlight ever swung our way.

If we’re truly living as one body, then exposing someone else’s wound is basically cutting into our own flesh. Protecting each other’s dignity isn’t about hiding sin or enabling bad behavior — it’s about making sure we aren’t feeding our entertainment craving with someone else’s shame.

So if you want to have a bad day—and to ruin a few others—keep stirring the pot. If you want peace? Put the spoon down. Close your mouth. And fill your mind with something better than the latest scandal.

And maybe… just maybe… hit delete instead of post and have a good day!